Friday, September 14, 2007

Trader Joe's Guy Speaks Again

Alex,

I'm pretty free this weekend, so let me know what your schedule is. I know a handful of good coffee and drink spots around.

Through the magic of Facebook, I realized that I definitely know your friends. Not sure I would have been able to match names and faces unassisted, but our paths crossed many times over the course of college.

Anyway, e-mail or call or whatever. Hope to meet you under circumstances other than over a cash register.

Trader Joe's Guy


***

Oh my god, how is it that I am working on a blog about dating in the digital age and I forgot to check Facebook? He so beat me to the punch on that one. Anyway, I soon remedied that situation and discovered that:
(a) he's not gay
(b) we have similar taste in music and movies
There's nothing on his page that says "love of my life" but there's also nothing on there that screams "run for the hills".

Now for Facebook etiquette. Do I add him as a friend? We've barely even met and if we don't end up clicking, he will always be there on my Facebook friends page, staring up at me from my computer screen and informing me of his every passing thought via status updates.

On the other hand, adding him as a friend has the singular benefit of allowing him to see my profile so that if he reads something that turns him off, he can politely become "totally swamped this weekend" and we can each back out gracefully.

Technology is kind of amazing.

***

Dear Trader Joe's Guy,

I can't believe I didn't think to Facebook stalk you! I'll admit that I did a cursory google search just to make sure I didn't turn up porn or felonies but I generally don't have the stamina to look beyond the first page. In other words, if your triple manslaughter was on the third page of search hits, you're in the clear.

I'm free tomorrow afternoon and Sunday evening. After four years in the neighborhood, you probably have a much better repertoire of coffee shops than I do so you pick the place. (I don't think that was actually an appropriate use of the word repertoire but ok.)

Alex


***

The best part is that I'm actually not thinking of this as a date at all. Making new friends is definitely a good thing.

5 comments:

Bennett said...

He can probably already see you profile - chances are that you are both part of the same network (whether through school or location). So, I would wait to add him as a friend. Like you said, you don't want him lingering around, clogging up your newsfeed for the rest of time.

Instead of coffee, take him to stalk the juggling guy. Two dates for the price of one! Now that would be some committed multi-tasking.

Alex said...

I actually have my Facebook set so that only my friends and current grad students at my school can see my profile so I don't think he can see it. But I agree that Facebook-friending can be a slippery slope and is best avoided until the last possible moment.

For probably two whole seconds after reading your idea to take him to stalk the juggler, I thought that was the most genius idea in history. So efficient!

Bennett said...

Also in the name of efficiency, you could take him on a 5 minute date. I hear they're all the rage.

kinslerbot said...

I still don't understand how you can see his facebook without being his friend! I didn't think that was possible...either way, Don't Friend him yet! ... in my humble opinion.

Alex said...

Yeah, totally not going to friend him. That was like a five second temporary insanity.

Also, in response your Facebook confusion, you can change your privacy settings to allow everyone to see your profile or just people in certain networks, etc.