Cause we need more reasons to show up in a creepster's Google search

I simply couldn't help it...this one was too good.

To the girl with the vagina - m4w (Upper East Side)

You are a girl, so I am pretty sure you have a vagina. The whole time I was thinking about talking to you, I was also thinking about your sweet, sweet vagina.

Vagina, vagina, vagina! The word flows off of the tongue like some sort of pagan incantation of carnal delight. I would have loved it if you had wanted me to stick my ding-dong in your furry cookie.

If you read this, and you are interested, send me an e-mail. (I know, no one reads these, right!?) But if it is you, describe your vagina to me in detail so I know it is you. Just to be safe, you should also describe your breasts. (Not to be a creep, but I want to be certain that it is you.)

Well no, you certainly don't want to come off as a creep.

Yoga Love on the A Train

14th Street Station - 9:40 am -serious eye candy across the platform - w4m - 25

you: tall, dark, handsome, dressed to the nines and looking a whole lot like a teacher from my yoga studio
me: brunette ponytail, pink hoodie, jeans and an avid fan of your body/sexy accent/ teaching style.

I was coming from the L train heading to the uptown A, when I saw you across the platform. We locked eyes and my heart skipped a beat. I couldn't tell from the fleeting glance if you were the teacher from my yoga studio who I have been crushing on for months and if you recognized me too, but I was definitely feeling some heat between us. If it is you, my yoga love, perhaps we could get together for a private session 'cause I could use some help on my positions...poses.

Rub-A-Dub (I want this man in my Tub)

Cosmos Laundromat - 7:30 pm - a ponytail and a green laundry sack - mid-20's

you: very sexy, scruffy, long hair brown pulled back, lugging a green laundry sack
me: blonde, purple silk blouse and jeans, searching frantically for a machine

I noticed you on the street first and my heart skipped a beat when I saw you walk in my laundromat. If you can look hot picking up laundry, I know you're the man for me. You immediately went to the back to pick up your bag from the Indian man with the mean look. I scrabbled for a free machine while trying to catch another glance. You crossed back and we nearly ran into each other, then exchanged looks. I followed you to the front of the store to look for other machines. You tilted your head to look back at me. You were either into me too or thought I was following you awkwardly. Let's hope it's the former, cause I could use some good clean fun.